For The Wrap Artist is all about the trimmings. No mass produced, cheap novelty paper for her, and she wouldn’t be caught dead defacing her gifts with a ribbon rosette. When it comes to wrapping she thinks outside the box, opting for sprigs of seasonal foliage tied with jaunty ribbons or rustic string – perfect for disguising a bog-standard present.
Come Christmas Day, Mrs Claus is all shopped out. No wonder; she’s been queuing for this year’s must-have toys and trawling Ebay for that elusive sold-out limited edition since her kids delivered their Christmas lists to the shopping mall Santa on December the 1st. Let’s hope she’s recovered by Boxing Day, the kids have plans for the New Year sales.
For Mrs Plastic Fantastic it’s all about the gift card. No more worrying about ruining the big day with a festive faux-pas for her. She’s never recovered from Christmas 95 when her boyfriend burst into tears after unwrapping a gift-box of XXS thongs. So what if vouchers are a little impersonal? At least one size fits all.
The Local Hero prefers to source unique finds from within a five-mile radius of his house. Christmas isn’t Christmas without a trip to the treasure trove of independent stores on his high street. And when it comes to the Christmas turkey, you can bet he’s on first name terms with the butcher, farmer and turkey family tree. Just don’t call his awarding-winning English fizz ‘Champagne.’
The Fantasy Shopper exists purely on paper, between the pages of glossy magazines who’s gift round-ups include high-end lust-objects no normal person can afford or dare use in real life. Diamond-studded headphones, anyone? Silk baby-grow? Or top of my fantasy wish list – a hand-wash only white cashmere jumper.
So what sort of Christmas shopper are you?
I confess I’m none of the above – we’ve decided to down-size on gifts this year. It’s the last time we’ll get away with it before Bouncing Boy goes to school and get bitten by present peer-pressure. But look out Christmas 2014: something tells me Mrs Claus will be out in force…